Roses & Thorns

Roses & Thorns

Thursday, October 30, 2014

Her Men by Ashley Ladd



Blurb:

Forty-four-year-old Julie Weston has loved Timmy and James since her college days twenty-something years ago. She’s fantasized about both men all these long years, never able to choose between them.

She attends their college marching band reunion, hoping Tim and James will go too. When both men show up, her dreams are answered. They’re sexier than she imagined and she prays that they won’t be disappointed by her older self.

It turns out both men came just to see her again and neither is happy about the other man’s presence. They fight over her, confusing her more than ever. It takes a hot ménage—or two—for her to decide which one she’s in love with.

Review by Julie Grimm:

I gave Her Men the first thorn for the plot line. Really? A college marching band reunion? The writer only uses this as an excuse for them to get together although I still don’t know what goes on at one of these reunions. I gave it the second thorn for the erotica. Julie Weston fantasizes about having sex with both men, and when she gets her wish, it happens just exactly as the fantasy is first written. There are no surprises there. The third thorn is for the ridiculous behavior of the two men. It’s so unbelievable.

Length:  90 Pages
Digital Price:  $3.50

You’ll notice we always include the publisher’s buy link. That’s because authors usually receive 40% of the book price from the publisher. Editors and cover artists usually receive about 5%. When you buy a book from Amazon, Barnes & Noble or another third-party vendor, they take a hefty cut and the author, editors and cover artists receive their cuts from what is left. So, if a book costs $5.99 at E-Book Publisher.com and you buy from there, the author will receive about $2.40. If you buy the book at Amazon, the author will receive about $0.83.

Downloading the file from your computer to your Kindle is as easy as transferring any file from your computer to a USB flash drive. Plug the larger USB end of your chord into a USB port on your computer and simply move the file from your “Downloads” box to your Kindle/Documents/Books directory. You can download your books onto your computer using “Save As” to a “Books” file you create and sort them into sub-folders by genre, author, or however you wish before transferring them to your Kindle. That way, if there’s a glitch with your Kindle, the books are on your computer. Your author will be happy you did when he/she sees his/her royalty statement.

Thanks for visiting. Rose, Julie, Donna, & Rochelle

Tuesday, October 28, 2014

The Complete How to Speak Southern By Steve Mitchell



Blurb:

The laugh sensation that swept the nation, How to speak Southern and More How to speak Southern, are now collected in one complete—and completely hilarious—volume.  Embraced by Southerners everywhere and dedicated to all Yankees in the hope that it will teach them to talk right, this uproarious book decodes “Suthun” wit and wisdom for “Nawthun” upstarts everywhere.  From “aig (a breakfast food that may be fried, scrambled, boiled or poached) to “zackly” (as in precisely), here’s just a sampling of what you’ll find inside:

ATTAIR: Contraction used to indicate the specific item desired. “Pass me attair gravy, please.”

EVERWHICHAWAYS: To be scattered in all directions. “You should have been there when the train hit that chicken truck. Them chickens flew everwhichaways.”

YONTNY: Do you want any. “Yontny more corn bread?”

Funny as well as informative, this laugh-out-loud dictionary will keep you laughing and learning–no matter where you fall on the Mason-Dixon Line!

Review by Rose Thornton:

The Complete How to Speak Southern, by Steve Mitchell, is a fun and lively book. Having grown up in the South, I found it to be rather exaggerated for the most part, but that is part of its charm. It makes a sharp point of the fact that people in the South do have their own peculiar way of communicating, and that they are delighted about this truth. Two of my favorite expressions found in Mitchell’s book are:

Kerosene cat in hell with gasoline drawers on: A colorful Southern expression used as an evaluation of someone’s ability to accomplish something. Ex: “He ain’t got no more chance than a kerosene cat in hell with gasoline drawers on.”

Motuhsickle: A two-wheeled missile with a powerful engine that is capable of great speed and is inherently unstable, thus providing physicians, hospitals and funeral directors with a regular source of income. Ex: “Johnny had his motuhsickle up to 120 last night.”

This book is filled with humorous definitions and usage examples and I do recommend it for light, entertaining reading.

Length: 105 Pages
Prices:
Print: $11.00
Digital: $9.99
Buy Link:

Sunday, October 26, 2014

Eruption: Yellowblown™, Book One by J. Hughey



Blurb:

I’m in the middle of the perfect college semester, hundreds of miles from Mom, with an awesome roomie and my freshman crush finally becoming a sophomore reality—Hotness! I’m figuring out calculus, I’ve got both hands on the handlebars and the wind of freedom in my hair. What on earth could slow my roll?

How about if the Yellowstone volcano erupts for the first time in six-hundred-thirty-thousand (630,000) years, spewing a continuous load of ash (crap) all over North America? Think that’ll put a kink in my bicycle chain?

Make that kinks, plural, because here’s a scientific fact I’ll bet you didn’t know. Nothing ruins the perfect semester like a super caldera. Now that I’ve made you smarter today, maybe you can tell me how to keep my life cruising in the right direction—no to Mom, yes to roomie, double yes to Hotness!—during a global disaster?

My lame name is Violet and, in the interest of full disclosure, I’m not hanging from the side of a cinder cone on the last page of this trauma, but there’s definitely more to come. Unless, of course, humans become extinct and then there’s not. Duh.

Eruption is book one in the Yellowblown™ Series.

Review by Rochelle Weber:


I loved Eruption. I've probably mentioned that twice a week I do volunteer work at the Captain James A. Lovell Federal Health Care Center (which I frequently refer to as "the VA" even though it's a Navy and Veteran's  hospital combined). I was so into Violet, Hotness, and the eruption that I came around the corner to the Quarterdeck (the entrance aboard ship or in a Navy facility) where there’s a large-screen TV that’s always set to CNN and saw a map of the US and was shocked when everything was green. I thought, Where’s the red bloom over Yellowstone? The brown smudge spreading across the US? Oh! That’s in the book! It’s FICTION! Thank goodness!


I don’t know if I could survive a disaster of global proportions. Violet gamely learns to load and fire a shotgun, and then goes squirrel hunting. She joins the assembly line on a farm where her grandmother and neighbors corral and kill a dozen chickens and then helps to pluck them while her grandpa and the neighbor’s son drain and gut them so she and her grandma will be able to take them home and can them in a broth made from the offal. I admire Violet’s courage and strong stomach. She adjusts to life mostly without power, helps dig out a pool to divert a stream and learns to live without running water—most of this with the help of Hotness, who is stranded with her family. She even manages to live with her Mom’s “supportocation.” That’s a combination of support and suffocation—a fine line every mother walks and frequently crosses. I love the word!


The eruption of the Yellowstone caldera truly is overdue according to geologists. I’ve seen programs discussing it on PBS, National Geographic, Discovery, etc. It’s one of those Extinction Level Events in my file of, “If it ever happens I’d like my whole family to be together—both daughters, sons-in-law, and all of my grandkids/great-grandkid.” I suppose my sons-in-law’s families would feel the same way.

The only thing I didn’t like was the ending. I appreciate that Eruption is the first book in a series, but it was sort of a cliff-hanger, and that’s one of my pet peeves. I really can’t wait for the next book in the “Yellowblown™ Series.” Darn it! Meanwhile, I suspect it’ll be awhile before I can look at a map of the US and not stare at Yellowstone.

Length:  204 Pages
Digital Price:  $0.99

Thanks for visiting. Rose, Julie, Donna, & Rochelle