Blurb:
Did you ever wish that you really understood
money? Well, Dave Barry wishes that he did, too. But that hasn’t stopped him
from writing this book. In it, Dave explores (as only he can) such topics as:
• How the
U.S. economy works, including the often overlooked role of Adam Sandler
• Why it
is not a good idea to use squirrels for money
•
Strategies that will give you the confidence you need to try for a good job,
even though you are—let’s be honest—a no-talent loser
• How
corporate executives, simply by walking into their offices, immediately become
much stupider
• An
absolutely foolproof system for making money in the stock market, requiring
only a little effort (and access to time travel)
•
Surefire tips for buying and selling real estate, the key being: Never buy—or,
for that matter, sell—real estate
• How to
minimize your federal taxes, safely and legally, by cheating
• Why
good colleges cost so much, and how to make sure your child does not get into
one
• How to
reduce the cost of your medical care by basically not getting any
• Estate
planning, especially the financial benefits of an early death
• And
many, many pictures of Suze Orman
But that’s only the beginning! Dave has also
included in this book all of the important points from a book written by Donald
Trump, so you don’t have to read it yourself. Plus he explains how to tip, how
to negotiate for everything (including bridge tolls), how to argue with your
spouse about money, and how much allowance to give your children (three dollars
is plenty). He also presents, for the first time in print anywhere, the Car
Dealership Code of Ethics (“Ethic Seven: The customer is an idiot”). Also,
there are many gratuitous references to Angelina Jolie naked. You can’t afford
not to buy this book! Probably you need several copies.
What kind of financial shape are you in right
now? This scientific quiz will show you.
Be honest in your answers: If you lie, you’ll
only be lying to yourself! The place to lie is on your federal tax return.
What is your annual income?
1. More
than $50,000.
2. Less
than $50,000.
3.
However much I get when I return these empties.
Not counting your mortgage, how much money do you
currently owe?
1. Less
than $10,000.
2. More
than $10,000.
3. Men
are threatening to cut off my thumbs.
How would you describe your portfolio?
1.
Conservative, mainly bonds and blue-chip equities.
2.
Aggressive, mainly options and speculative stocks.
3. My
what?
When analyzing an investment, what do you
consider to be the most important factor?
1. The
amount of return.
2. The
degree of risk.
3. The
name of the jockey.
How do you plan to finance your retirement?
1.
Savings.
2. Social
security.
3. Sale
of kidneys.
Review:
If
you already know Dave Barry as an author, I need say no more. He is one of the funniest writers of modern
times, perhaps of all times. My only caution with his book, Dave Barry’s Money Secrets, is to beware
that the reader may find himself feeling self-conscious about laughing out-loud
in serious contexts, such as I did while sneaking moments of reading time
during a boring meeting. I highly recommend this book for all the fun of it!
Thanks
for visiting, Rose, Julie & Rochelle
Length:
240 Pages
Prices:
Print:
$13.95
Digital:
$9.99
Buy Link:
